The term dad means more to me than some will know. At a very young age, my mom meet what ended up being my step dad at the time. Through what seemed like the worst custody battle in the century of time, back and forth I went! From mom’s to my real dad’s. I remember all the “bad” times more than anything. Just the stress, headaches and tension of that “battle” is something I will always remember and I never want that for Brodie.

In the mix of that battle, came an adoption. My “step dad” became my dad. I remember CRYING my eyes out sitting in that court room on a hot August day. The tears were tears of a small child that had no idea why I was in the position I was in. Having to tell the judge whether or not this was something I wanted was scary. My entire life I have been a people pleaser so I was scared to say yes and hurt anyone’s feelings. BUT I’m thankful for the yes WE made. He took my sister and I in as his own like we’d been his the entire time. He stepped up to continue raising us when he didn’t have to. I used to BEAT myself up thinking it was my fault that my real dad gave up his parental rights. I may never fully understand, but that’s ok. I know that whatever the reason, it’s one that only one person will understand and it was just the path that was supposed to happen. Up until probably my 18th birthday I always wondered why? What did I do wrong? Was there something I could have done to change his mind? Was it just a way to not fight anymore? One day I just “woke up”. Whatever the reason, it wasn’t for me to know. I was raised by a good man. Sure he wasn’t perfect, but he did a lot more for me than what most men would for children that aren’t “his”.

We have butted heads A LOT! That doesn’t change how he cares for me. I know without a doubt in my mind that I can call him right this second if I needed anything and he’d be here. We don’t have to talk everyday to know that he loves me. I’ll tell you the scariest time in my life was telling him I was pregnant! You know what the only thing he really said when I told him was? You’re finishing school. I don’t care what you finish in, but you will not quit. I don’t know if I thought he’d yell or beat me or what, but I was TERRIFIED to tell him lol. After I got it out, I was like well that wasn’t that bad! He even let me move back home to finish up my last semester of college! Since then he’s been super pumped about being a “paw paw” to a BOY! Man was he excited when we found out what Brodie was! Being in a house with 3 women for 15+ years was tough on the poor guy. I mean he’s got the grey hair to prove it!

My parents divorced a couple years ago and one thing that concerned me was what would happen to our relationship. I mean he became my dad when he didn’t have to be when he was married to my mom. He was very reassuring that he wasn’t going anywhere. That meant a lot to me. We don’t have a lot of pictures together because dad hates cameras, BUT this is the most recent one we have of us together. This is a man that isn’t perfect, but he took us in and made us his when he didn’t have to. He helped try to mold us into decent people, teach us lessons on finances and smart decisions, tried to make “men” out of us when it came to “outside” stuff, but overall loved us. We probably tested his patience more than what he would have liked. Actually, I know we did.

Adoption is a scary thing. Taking a child for the rest of it’s life that isn’t yours by blood. Family is more than blood. Children deserve the best life no matter who gives is. The best life doesn’t have to be bought. It doesn’t have to be “things” that make it great. Stuff can be replaced, thrown away, etc. but people are there for ever. That’s what makes it the best life. Just by being there. Would I change our story? Absolutely not!

Thanks for being dad when you didn’t have to be!