As a parent, I’ve gone above and beyond for birthday parties. I mean seriously almost in tears overwhelmed to make sure everything was PERFECT. I’ve spent tons of money on decorations and huge cakes and tons of food for EVERYONE. BUT one thing I would forget is that as long as Brodie had fun it’s a win! No matter how good the food is, or if there’s decorations, or if a ton of people come. If he’s having fun then everything was perfect no matter how many imperfections I saw.
This year due to baseball schedules and other events, I waited until the last minute to book his birthday party. He wanted to do Altitude in Lake Charles, which is perfect for me. Show up, bring cake and stay out of their way because they do it all. I literally booked it the Tuesday before his birthday on Saturday. So of course I scramble to invite all of our family and panic to make sure I don’t forget anyone because lord knows you don’t forget to invite family members or you’ll never hear the end. Well I’m the mix of that, mom of the year forgets to notify any moms of Brodie’s friends. I knew a lot of them were gone for baseball, but his friends from school, friends we have, etc I totally forgot!! As I’m pulling into Altitude I realize I haven’t invited a soul really! Then panicky mom kicks in. Of course now I’m worried he won’t have any friends to jump with and my fear was right. One of his cousins came and a lot of our family was there, but no other kiddos. St the end of the day Brodie still has an incredible time and even said it was his favorite birthday. They are all his favorite, but I’ll take it!
That little bit of relief knowing he had a blast. Spend the time to have them a party. Even if it’s the smallest party! Just something to honor them and make them feel special for the day. It means the most to them!!
And moms don’t worry about all the flashy stuff. Birthdays aren’t for anyone else, but the birthday kiddo!
I made this YUMMY dish the other night! It’s definitely being made again!!
Ingredients
2 cups uncooked spiral pasta
1 cup sour cream
1 cup salsa
1 teaspoon cumin
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon onion powder
1 can (15 oz) corn (drained)
1 can (15 oz) black beans (drained & rinsed)
2 cups cooked shredded/chunked chicken
2 cups shredded cheese
Instructions
Heat oven to 350 degrees. Prepare a greased 9×13 baking dish.
Cook pasta according to package directions. Make sure you add a little bit of salt to the water!
While pasta is cooking, combine sour cream, salsa, cumin, garlic powder, and onion powder in a large mixing bowl.
Drain the pasta once it’s done and add into the sour cream mixture. Stir to combine. Add in the corn, black beans, chicken, and 1 cup of the shredded cheese. Stir together to combine.
Pour into the baking dish and sprinkle the remaining cheese on top. Cover with tin foil and cook for 20 minutes.
Take the tin foil off and let cook an additional 5 minutes. Garnish with green onions, tomato, black olives and avocado slices if wanted.
I cooked mine in my Pampered Chef Covered Baker so I didn’t use foil, I just used my lid. I also added the black olives and cheese after it cooked for 20 minutes, then cooked it an additional 5 just to get the cheese to melt. I also used lentil noodles! No one even knew 🙂
Did you know that 1 in 4 pregnancies end in either miscarriage, still birth or infant loss? That’s a scary statistic. There are so many women out there who fall in this statistic and we may not ever know because it’s not something many people talk about.
When I found out I was pregnant in May 2015, I was in SHOCK. I had been taking my little birth control regularly and Cameron just started his first rotation in Iraq. I got this weird feeling and I just knew I was pregnant. I’ll never forget taking a pregnancy test in the very last stall in the bathroom at my JOB…of all places to take one. I just couldn’t wait. I knew I was pregnant. I just needed that little stick to tell me I was correct. After a long couple of minutes and the stick hiding under my keyboard, I couldn’t look at it. I was SCARED. Why? Who knows! There right before my eyes PREGNANT 2+ WEEKS is what that little stick said. So I stepped outside and gave my hubby a call while he was on the other side of the world to tell him we were going to be parents again. The guilt I have for the thoughts I had after finding out I was pregnant haunts me at times. I remember wondering how on earth would we pay for daycare for 2 littles. Wondering how could we make it work financially. Knowing that bringing a second child in the world meant Cameron would have to stay overseas longer than we “planned”. I regret EVERY thought like that I was feeling at the time.
Being I had Brodie at 33 weeks, I was considered high risk now. I was seeing specialists and taking shots weekly in my back side to help keep me pregnant for as long as possible. Everything was looking great! I had a checkup on a day that Cameron was flying back home so I was able to see him in person for the first time since I told him I was pregnant literally two week after he left and show him pictures of baby Morrow. Not long after that we went on vacation to Tennessee. About a week later our worlds would change.
September 16, 2015: 20 weeks, 6 days. That day changed my life. The day before I called my doctor because I just felt like something was wrong. I made him check me and everything was good, but my gut was telling me something was wrong. The night of the 15th, Cameron fell asleep in Brodie’s bed and I passed out in ours. About 3:00AM I woke up to a terrible pain. FOX News was on my TV, I’ll never forget because their spinning clock at the bottom left hand of the screen is how I counted my contractions because I couldn’t move to get my phone. I laid there for a while thinking, ehh they will stop. I mean I was fine yesterday according to the doctor. After 45 minutes and contractions 5 minutes, I realized they weren’t stopping. So I waddled down the hall and woke Cameron because I knew something was wrong. Swooping up Brodie, getting us all in the car so we could drop off Brodie to my in-laws and get me to the hospital was the blurriest time in my life. I felt like I could rip my car door off the hinge I was in so much pain. We get to the hospital and I will never forget Cameron telling me he was not leaving me in the parking lot to get me a wheelchair, we were going to make it in there! I wanted to just quit right there in the parking lot. Once we got inside, they made Cameron go get me checked in. So here I am, just me and Shanna, the nurse, I’m semi hyperventilating I think. She reassures me everything is going to be ok and that because I’m not very far along it’s probably ok. Man I was sure hoping so! She let me know she was going to check me just to insure that. I will never forget her face. When she started to cry. I knew something was wrong. I felt awful because that poor girl had no plans to be delivering news like what I was about to receive that night. I mean by the time I got there she only had 3 hours left of her shift.
She kept apologizing for breaking down and said I want to have someone double check you. I remember saying why? Is everything ok? And she said I just want to double check, but you are fully dilated and your baby is coming. Tears. They just poured. I’d like to say I am fairly intelligent, but when she said that all I could say is what does that mean. I was blank. I had no thoughts. A few minutes later Cameron came in from getting me checked in and he knew. Just from the look on my face. All I could do is say I’m sorry. And the smile and touch on my face he gave me let me know it was going to be ok and I wasn’t alone.
It was now on my time. Delivery could happen at whatever time I was ready to push. At this point, there’s no epidural, it’s too late. There’s almost no chance of survival. There’s no stopping labor. Nothing. Somehow I laid there for 2 MORE HOURS before I felt like I needed to push. Once it was “time” it went fast. The doctor wasn’t even ready yet. I caught him. One little breath latter and that was it. 6:50 AM September 16, 2015. The scariest day of my life.
The days to follow were ROUGH to say the least. I had to stay for observation. Did you know that when you loose a child they put a special card on your door to make sure the nurses know why you are there? 3 of the nurses I had while I stayed had actually been in the same shoes as me. It made it so much easier knowing I wasn’t alone. It must have been fate that those women were on duty those days and nights when I needed someone most. They were INCREDIBLE!
I don’t share this story for sympathy. I share it because I’m comfortable talking about it now. I still have moments where it bothers me. Heck 2 nights ago was one of them. I share it because I know there is someone out there who needs to hear that she isn’t alone. I hang on to knowing that it’s ok to break down, scream, cry, etc. because I know other women feel the same way.
The term dad means more to me than some will know. At a very young age, my mom meet what ended up being my step dad at the time. Through what seemed like the worst custody battle in the century of time, back and forth I went! From mom’s to my real dad’s. I remember all the “bad” times more than anything. Just the stress, headaches and tension of that “battle” is something I will always remember and I never want that for Brodie.
In the mix of that battle, came an adoption. My “step dad” became my dad. I remember CRYING my eyes out sitting in that court room on a hot August day. The tears were tears of a small child that had no idea why I was in the position I was in. Having to tell the judge whether or not this was something I wanted was scary. My entire life I have been a people pleaser so I was scared to say yes and hurt anyone’s feelings. BUT I’m thankful for the yes WE made. He took my sister and I in as his own like we’d been his the entire time. He stepped up to continue raising us when he didn’t have to. I used to BEAT myself up thinking it was my fault that my real dad gave up his parental rights. I may never fully understand, but that’s ok. I know that whatever the reason, it’s one that only one person will understand and it was just the path that was supposed to happen. Up until probably my 18th birthday I always wondered why? What did I do wrong? Was there something I could have done to change his mind? Was it just a way to not fight anymore? One day I just “woke up”. Whatever the reason, it wasn’t for me to know. I was raised by a good man. Sure he wasn’t perfect, but he did a lot more for me than what most men would for children that aren’t “his”.
We have butted heads A LOT! That doesn’t change how he cares for me. I know without a doubt in my mind that I can call him right this second if I needed anything and he’d be here. We don’t have to talk everyday to know that he loves me. I’ll tell you the scariest time in my life was telling him I was pregnant! You know what the only thing he really said when I told him was? You’re finishing school. I don’t care what you finish in, but you will not quit. I don’t know if I thought he’d yell or beat me or what, but I was TERRIFIED to tell him lol. After I got it out, I was like well that wasn’t that bad! He even let me move back home to finish up my last semester of college! Since then he’s been super pumped about being a “paw paw” to a BOY! Man was he excited when we found out what Brodie was! Being in a house with 3 women for 15+ years was tough on the poor guy. I mean he’s got the grey hair to prove it!
My parents divorced a couple years ago and one thing that concerned me was what would happen to our relationship. I mean he became my dad when he didn’t have to be when he was married to my mom. He was very reassuring that he wasn’t going anywhere. That meant a lot to me. We don’t have a lot of pictures together because dad hates cameras, BUT this is the most recent one we have of us together. This is a man that isn’t perfect, but he took us in and made us his when he didn’t have to. He helped try to mold us into decent people, teach us lessons on finances and smart decisions, tried to make “men” out of us when it came to “outside” stuff, but overall loved us. We probably tested his patience more than what he would have liked. Actually, I know we did.
Adoption is a scary thing. Taking a child for the rest of it’s life that isn’t yours by blood. Family is more than blood. Children deserve the best life no matter who gives is. The best life doesn’t have to be bought. It doesn’t have to be “things” that make it great. Stuff can be replaced, thrown away, etc. but people are there for ever. That’s what makes it the best life. Just by being there. Would I change our story? Absolutely not!
I sit here in semi tears as we approach Brodie’s 6th birthday. When I found out I was pregnant with him, I felt like my world just got rocked. I was 20 years old, in college, living on my own and hadn’t been dating Cameron very long. How could I be a mom? Packed up my stuff and moved home to start a new life. I finished my last semester of college online. I got ready to start a life with Cameron as parents. 21 years young. I was sick everyday. After a short 7 month pregnancy, little Brodie made his entrance at 33 weeks.
During my pregnancy and even after, I would get remarks like “you haven’t lived yet”, “you two should get married to make this ‘right'”, “you did it all backwards” etc. The looks were even better! So many people were quick to judge a young mom. Truth be told if I had to do it all again, I’d do it the exact same way.
We all grew together and learned about life. We did what we had to do to make things work. In the beginning it was ROUGH. Stupid fights, small spaces, no money, etc. After our first year with little Brodie, we were able to buy a house. We spent a lot of time apart with Cameron on the road, but we made it work. Looking back, I used to get emotional about him having all the best stuff, but let’s be honest, he doesn’t remember the first couple years of his life so I did all that stressing for nothing! As he got a little older, I watched him mold into a tiny person with his own personality. As much as he needed me, I needed him more. He kept me strong when it was just me and him while Cameron sacrificed being overseas to make sure we had what we needed. Many nights we were in bed by 7:00 just watching movies with all the lights off or staying in our pj’s all day because we could. Seeing those chunky cheeks made all the down times and stressful days worth it.
He’s kept me on my toes since the day he was born! We’ve been through many phases! Colic kicked our butts, biting kids got us kicked out of two daycares, attitudes got him a lot of spankings, visiting the principal’s office in PRE-SCHOOL and having ISS made momma cry A LOT, but he’s also got a sweet side that shows me he’s got a little bit of momma’s soft heart that melts me to my core. He’s my pride, joy and pain in the butt all in one.
Parenting isn’t easy whatsoever. I have lost my cool more time than I’d like to admit, I’ve let him get away with more than he should, I’ve bought him stuff he probably didn’t need, I’ve been a little more strict than I ever thought I’d be, but I know in my heart I am doing what’s best for him. He’s my one and only. Don’t let society tell you how you should raise your child or how many kids you should have. Trust me if I could have 10 kids I would, but for now, I am blessed with a funny, sweet, almost 6 year old little boy.
Just remember you aren’t alone. That’s something I often forget. There are other people who have experienced things very similar to me and maybe even worse. It’s not about the materialistic things because those can all be replaced. The memories and the love are the things that matter most. Let them make messes. Let them be loud. Let them sing it out with you in the car. Let them cuddle in rain storms. Let them tell you all the pretend stories they come up with. Let them know how loved they are. Let them be little. The grow faster than you’d ever imagine. Here’s to year 6!
Marriage isn’t fairytales and everything Disney makes it out to be. Couples can face trials and tribulations that no one expects or prepares for. Facing trials should be lessons in life that we learn and grow from.
My husband and I have been together for 7 years. Rumor has it that once you make it past 7 years you’re golden because you made it past the “7 year itch”. The only itch I have is my back and he scratches it!
In our 7 years, we’ve endured much more than most couples see in a life time. Those trials we faced together made us stronger as individuals and a couple. When I was at my lowest of lows and highest of highs, he was there. He is the person I’m most comfortable with. Couples should have that with their significant other. We can talk about everything. We don’t keep secrets, we’re open to each other, we listen to each other and love hard. I have a love for my husband like no other. Because of how we’ve handle our relationship and grown together, I never picture life with anyone else.
When times seem hard, people are too quick to jump to quitting. This is also a time where people start to wander and become unfaithful. If there’s one bit advise I can give is be honest with each other and don’t hide anything. Is our marriage perfect? Absolutely not. But you know what? We’ve made it us and as perfect as we could. No relationship is perfect.
Remember you aren’t alone when you have a little argument. It’s ok to disagree. Just don’t let it consume you. The little saying “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me” is ironic because truth be told words can hurt and what you say when you emotions are high can change a whole relationship. Once words are said you can’t take them back. Never go to bed mad. Don’t fight over the little stuff. We don’t argue often at all, but our biggest arguments have been over little things that shouldn’t matter. We sit back and laugh at how “dumb” we were arguing over laundry!
All relationships are different. What works for me and my husband may not work for you and that’s ok! You have to find what works best. No two couples are alike. Just remember, stay true to yourself and each other. Don’t give up when times get tough!
I’m thankful my husband never gave up on me when he could have MANY times!
Growing up I used to hide my smile. After lots of begging and thousands of my parent’s dollars later…I show those suckers off.
I used to think my gapped, crooked teeth were a flaw and it embarrassed me. Once that was fixed, I found something else to pick apart. The “flaw saga” was always continuing. It was easy for me to pick myself apart. I was and AM my biggest critic. I spent a lot of my “younger” years worrying about what people thought of me and how I looked. Heck, I still find myself at time worrying what people will say about me or how they think of me. Being closer to 30 than 20, I realize I spent way too many years “growing up” worrying about others thoughts and not caring more about myself. I conformed to different styles, different people, just a different me. The real me got put on the back burner a lot because I never knew what people would actually think of me.
I was once told, “You may be the biggest, juiciest, tastiest peach, but someone isn’t going to like peaches.” This is so true! Be true yourself. You can’t please everyone.
The one person you should worry or care for most is yourself. I find myself often caring about others over myself. You have to be pleased with yourself first.
Self care is a very important part of my life now. Even if it’s just 20 minutes a day, I take time for ME. Caring for others is fantastic, but if you don’t care for yourself there won’t be a you to care for others. Take some time each day. Focus on you. Unwind, rejuvenate and refresh your mind. I like to JAM music and sing to the top of my lungs. It’s a stress reliever and a way to just forget the things that are on your mind. Disconnect. Turn off your phone, step away from the computer. Just focus on you. No matter how you do it, take a minute for you. Realize how amazing you are and how you are making your mark on this earth. If there’s one piece of advise I could give, it would be to take it easy on yourself. Don’t be so hard and give yourself the care your body, mind and soul need.
P.S. Open the sunroof, roll down the windows, JAM some music and jut drive. That’s a great stress reliever for me and it’s how I unwind when I feel like I can’t go anymore.
Kate. Simply Living; 